Monday, June 18, 2012

Hello Again!

So it's been awhile since I've posted. Actually, it's been almost six months...
But I'm back!
To celebrate my return, I'd like to thank one of the lovely ladies that pushed me to blog again. She's a fantastic artist, you can check out some of her charcoal works here! Or, if blogging isn't your style, (which would be weird since you're reading this on a blog...) you can like her page "Handmade Photobooth" on facebook. Definitely worth your time.
These past six-ish months have been kind of crazy. And kind of ridiculous and really stupid and somewhat of a down-er. Therefore, I will not waste your time or your good mood by talking about them. Instead, I should talk about the future.
I get to be in an opera this summer! We start rehearsals in just under a month, and along with being in the opera, we get to have a bunch of teachers come in and workshop with us to improve our techniques. This is going to be such a great opportunity for me, and I hope that my voice really gets to come out and grow this summer.
My Junior Recital is in November! Sooooo crazy! I have most of my music memorized, with the exception of a couple of pieces that are super close to being ready. My mind might just explode with too much musical-intake for the next couple of months. I can't wait though, this is a huge mile-marker for me.
Speaking of mile-markers, I should probably start to run or do some exercise or something. Eh, I'll think about it ;)

Wednesday, February 1, 2012

February is Here!

Oh. My. Goodness. It's February. Instead of a New Year's Resolution, I'm going to incite a better tradition - A New Month's Resolution. What is my resolution for this month? Update my blog at least once in February. Hey look, I've already accomplished my goal!
In honor of this new month upcoming, I feel inclined to remind you that Valentine's Day is in 13 days. That means that I only have 13 more days to mentally brace myself for whatever might come this year. Some of you might be thinking "What's the big deal? Valentine's Day comes around every year." But this year is different kids. This year Brandy is finally dating someone when it rolls around! We thought it might never happen!
So here are the dilemmas: Do I get him something? Will he get me something? Are we finally going to kiss? Do I need to plan out a special day? Am I thinking through this too much, and/or am I being too pushy and clingy? I have no answer for any of these questions. I asked him if we were going to get each other gifts, and his response was "I'll never ask you to get me anything, but if you do, I can't really stop you." So I then asked, "Well, do you think that you'd be getting me something?" And if I could remember his response I would tell you all, but it honestly has slipped through my short-term memory's little grasp. So I'm at a stand-still. Even worse, if I did decide to get him something, what on earth would it be?!
I don't really want to worry about this right now. I just want to enjoy his company and pretend like Valentine's Day isn't even coming this year. Instead of Groundhog day for-telling when the next season will arrive, I think it should be changed to decide whether or not Valentine's Day is held that year. If the groundhog comes out and sees his shadow, the sun is out enough for people to be basking in the light and forget about all of the follies of Valentine's Day. But, on the other hand, if the groundhog sees no shadow, let the lovey-dovey begin! Hopefully then there would be less years in which I would have to worry about silly things such as these.
Happy February everyone! 13 More days of unresolved questioning :)

Tuesday, November 22, 2011

Long Time No See

It's been a very long time my friends. Life has been busy busy, and I feel somewhat bad that my blog got neglected for the past month or so. Hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm what to write....
Let's talk about my performance life. It's been fantastic - I've had either concerts or recitals at least once a week. I'm very blessed to be able to eat up the musical lifestyle. Yum. For a time in my life I wasn't sure if music was what I really wanted to do with my life. I was seriously debating switching my major (to who knows what) or just dropping out to go to cosmetology school. That would've been a mistake. After some soul searching, I rekindled my passion for music so I feel can finally feel content with where I am right now.
I'm thankful to be happy with my life. I also went through a rough patch in which I felt like my life wasn't progressing. I was unhappy and felt as if I had no direction. But, after a lovely talk with my amazing Bishop, the fog I was living in felt lifted. I just needed to see the bigger picture.
Boys? Oh boys. I have four best best friends (or brothers rather) that fill my days with laughter. I love each of them so much, but I know that someday they all can't be my best friends. When I'm all old and married I want my husband to be my best friend. No offense to the boys, but you all can't be my husbands unless polyandry is brought to the United States. Even then it'd still be icky. Other than all of my brothers, I do still like other guys too. I finally met someone that gives me hope for the future, makes me want to try harder, and I feel more like myself whenever we talk than when I talk to anyone else. I like those feelings :)

Friday, October 7, 2011

Learning Experiences

So I've realized that my blog has turned into my personal-gossip column. With myself. So be it I guess.

It's interesting to see how much I've learned about myself in the past week alone. It mainly started last wednesday when I was practically forced to face myself honestly, and admit that I have a poor self-image and that one of my biggest priorities right now is to learn to love myself now. So I spent around five hours that night reminding myself why I am the way that I am, that the person who I am is a person that is worthwhile, and that the Lord loves me. (That involved candles, Christmas lights, the scriptures, and love notes from parents and friends.) I highly recommend spending a little time to get to know yourself again.
I found out the next day that the afore mentioned A-Train has a "thing" for a dear friend of mine. I then learned that I have a hard time letting go, but once I've let go, I'm usually alright.
General Conference goes by, and I learned (or remembered rather), that the Gospel is the most uplifting thing in my life and my best source for happiness.
Now for those who don't know, I'm a fast mover. I like to be liking someone. And now that I've almost completely let go of A-Train, my back-up option has moved to slot number 1. So on wednesday, (as in three days ago), we went on a date. It was one of the best, if not greatest, date of my life. I fell, and I fell hard. Harder than all of the other times that is. I learned that I was able to actually picture myself with someone, I was able to be myself with someone, and we were happy. After every time that I see him, I always think to myself "I want to marry someone like that."
So today I hung out with him before our class started, all was peachy and as great as I remembered. After class, I see him talking to a friend of mine from high school. I heard him ask her what she was doing tonight. After seeing the look on my face, a friend of mine decided to be my spy and listen to the rest of the conversation. He got her phone number, address, and they had made plans for the night.
What did I learn from that? I get hurt easily. I probably don't read people very well. I instantly started comparing myself to the other girl, and my recently built up self esteem faltered.
My friends consoled me, told me that he was simply "trying on other pairs of shoes," and that he could very likely still be interested in me even though he asked my friend out.
But I don't feel much better. I fell practically in love in around a week and a half. I was practically destroyed within minutes.
Interesting how life plays out sometimes.

Monday, September 26, 2011


Alright children, it's time for story time again. Worry not, I'll make this one somewhat brief.

So every time I see A-Train I blush really bad, mince my words, and make an idiot of myself. Awesome. Not the point though. There is another certain some one who I've known for a couple of months now that has me confused. For the sake of blogging, we'll call him Mr. More-or-Less.
About a month ago Mr. More-or-Less attempted to take me on a date. It was somewhat horrific. Ok, horrific wasn't a nice way to put it. On the list of worst dates ever, it wasn't all that terrible. But it wasn't all that great either. We kind of stop talking and hanging out as much afterwards. No skin off my back.
But then yesterday, out of the blue, he texts me and says "I think we need to spend more time together. I've missed you." Hmmm. Interesting. Either this man is lonely and thinks I'm desperate, or he's finally come to his senses. What the hey. I said "Sure, if you'd really like to try again."
Now he always wants to find excuses to spend time with me. I graced him with my presence tonight, and it was actually somewhat fun. We ate unhealthy things and then swung on the tallest swing-set I've ever seen in my life.
Problem? 1. I think a recently close friend of mine likes him too. (On the other hand, that's never really stopped me before, but this leads me into the next problem...) 2. A-Train. I think I like A-Train enough to not bother with Mr. More-or-Less and let the friend have him. 3. I think Mr. More-or-Less might like me more than I know.
Solution? No clue. But so far, I'm in favor of A-Train. I'll keep y'all posted though, don't worry. I have a concert on thursday and I'm out-of-my-skin excited to see A-Train in a Tux. Foreshadowing? I sure hope so :)

Saturday, September 24, 2011

Party Barn?

It's that time again guys. It's time to tell you all about what's happened recently in the realm of boys and singing. (Man, this is like all my life consists of lately...)

So last night was Masterworks Chorale Retreat. We went up to the Party Barn in Mapleton, and boy, it was a party alright. (I spent a good portion of that afternoon beautifying myself just so I'd look super adorable because a certain someone would be there. Dumb but worth it.) The first thing we did when we all got up to the barn was eat. So I ate whatever I wanted. Boy it felt good. :D Then my friend and I decided to go for a lovely little stroll since there was a lake, deck, and canoes outback. Everyone else eventually followed. We then decided to take out one of the canoes, which was indeed a wise choice. That's when it started.

A certain highly attractive man whom I've mentioned before on this magical blog came into my life more prominently. For the sake of sake's, let's call him A-Train. (Not like that's his nickname or anything...) While M and I (Oooh look! Another nickname. I'm good at this.) were lingering on our canoe, A-Train had put on his swimsuit and asked for a ride over to the rope swing. Of course we obliged. Mmmmm I will forever love that rope swing, if ya know what I'm sayin'.

So then we actually started singing. In one of our pieces A-Train has a solo, which makes my life happy. Our director had us go in the loft to sing and we got to stand next to whomever we wanted. So naturally, I stood next to the soloist. That was an amazing moment. Not only does he got the looks, but he's got the voice too. Not too shabby so far.

Then we decided to play games as a choir. That was a blast! I sat next to my buddies All-Back, Uncle Joe, and A-Train of course. Yes, those names were all coded. You're Welcome. During the game there was a moment when just A-Train and I had act out an adverb. That was interesting... We soon after promised each other to never act in such a manner again.

Then we ate cake. Yum. Get ready guys, the sad part is coming up soon. Tissues in hand? K good, I'll continue.

This is when the big group split to do various activities. It was dark out, and the stars were amazing. So my adopted brother, Bear, and I decided to take out the canoes again. Yes, I do realize that I just said Brother Bear. That canoe ride was one of the best experiences of my life. We talked about our lives, our feelings, and then we sang in Italian together while the reflection in the lake shone brightly and a bonfire was only a few feet off. Beautiful. Yet part of me wished that I could share this moment with another special someone. So Brother Bear and I left and canoe to join the others at the campfire. A-Train was preoccupied with the guitar (Handsome: Check. Voice: Check. Guitar?! Too good to be true) so I waited a little while. I sang while he sang and played the song "Lucky" which is one of my favorites. Check. While A-Train was guitaring it up, I was chatting with a lovely soprano friend of mine, and that's when I realized that not only do I have a mongo-big crush on A-Train, but so do like half of the other girls in the choir. Great. They're all amazing and beautiful and stuff. :( I felt a bit discouraged. And by a bit, I mean a lot.

Now brace yourselves.

When A-Train was done with the guitar I went up to him and said "Hey, when one of the canoes is open, do you wanna go out on the lake?"
"Sure, that sounds like fun." He replied handsomely.
So we waited only like two minutes for someone to surrender a canoe. Then, right as I was about to get him and tell him there was a canoe open, my carpool says that we're leaving.
A-Train was like "It's okay, I'm feelin' kinda bushed anyways." :( :( :( :( :(
So we left. And that was it.

Tuesday, September 13, 2011

Why I'm a Happy Little Camper

I slightly altered the name of my blog. It is currently: Awake, Love, Sing! Why? Oh, I'll tell ya why.

Sometimes I need to remind myself to wake up every morning. But most of the time, I need to remind myself to be fully awake during class and/or throughout my ever-tiring days.
Let's be serious, most of my blog discusses my love life or just love in general. I figured it was about time to add love into the title because it is such an important part of my life. Worry not, we'll retouch this subject shortly.
I am constantly singing. Whether I make sound with my throat or if the music just plays on in my heart, it will always be one of the biggest parts of me. How can I keep from Singing?

So back to the love portion. I found me a new man to lavish my pretended affections upon. Is he attractive? Definitely. Can he sing? Ahhhhh yeah. Is he like one of the most amazing people ever? Heck YES! Am I a little obsessed? Probably. Is it a little unhealthy? Probably more so. Do I care? OF COURSE NOT! :DDDDDDDDDD I'm a happy little camper alright :)